Eight years had passed when my Gynecologist told me that I have the risk of not having a baby. It tore my heart apart and I started imagining things. WHAT IF ? That is the big question I have had most of the time. During the day, I found myself alone mulling over whether I will be a mother someday or not at all. Then we’ve waited and never lose hope. We have lived the life of a newly wed couple. Visiting Marseille was the first thing we did. Going to cinema almost every week, inviting friends over for dinner, organizing a party, hiking, doing sports and we did everything that interest us. I have also concentrated on studying French Language as a part of my integration in France to be occupied with something useful.
I almost forgot the sad scenario of my life. My husband has been supportive and I am really grateful for that. He once told me that “Life of a couple doesn’t evolve to being a parent. Having kids is not an obligation, it’s by choice and life should continue” ! He continued telling me that there are happy couple without children. This is not to assure me but he wanted me to see life’s reality. I find that the subject of having kids or or not is one of the great "taboos" of our existence. There are people who love kids but they don’t have one…. It's called childfree by choice. And why are there priests, devoted singles, monks and nuns? Because they choose a vocation and they’re happy about it.
But personally, we wanted to be parents but it was not coming. So I’ve learned to let go. I went on with my life. Be a good wife to my husband. I busied myself as best I could and protect myself from depressing thoughts. I had worked my way up to improve my French which took all of my energy. Learning French has also given me tremendous effort to appreciate this complicated language.
We wanted to be parents and we always believe that there are solutions to this right ? If worse comes to worst we will eventually consider the In-Vitro Fertilization. And if IVF won’t work adoption will be our second recourse.
Years had passed. One day, I went to my Gyne for a yearly check-up. Particularly because I felt a sharp pain from my lower abdomen. I didn’t think of anything else because that’s me when I normally have my monthly period. But when I went out from the clinic I had the biggest surprise of my life…..I was 2 weeks pregnant ! I cannot believe it but I was. Over the past 2 years after we got married, we had our first child and we named him Sébastien. In most situations, I know our waiting time appears to be relatively short compared to many. After 2 years and 3 months to be exact, I gave birth to another baby. Our second child is born and we named her Mayumi.
Husband keeps on bugging me for a third child. It’s not that I want it but I think we really are lucky to have already both. I did not stop taking my contraceptive pills and despite of that things had happened for a reason so consider it a blessing. When it rains, it pours ! blog about this to officially announce to friends that I am 4 months on the way for the third time. That is the reason why I am out of the circulation for a couple of months. The first 3 months was not easy but I feel better now. Now that I am back, I think I need to put a little life on this deserted blog. I believe in the saying, “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle”.
This is how the baby looks like, taken on the 11th week of my pregnancy
I almost forgot the sad scenario of my life. My husband has been supportive and I am really grateful for that. He once told me that “Life of a couple doesn’t evolve to being a parent. Having kids is not an obligation, it’s by choice and life should continue” ! He continued telling me that there are happy couple without children. This is not to assure me but he wanted me to see life’s reality. I find that the subject of having kids or or not is one of the great "taboos" of our existence. There are people who love kids but they don’t have one…. It's called childfree by choice. And why are there priests, devoted singles, monks and nuns? Because they choose a vocation and they’re happy about it.
But personally, we wanted to be parents but it was not coming. So I’ve learned to let go. I went on with my life. Be a good wife to my husband. I busied myself as best I could and protect myself from depressing thoughts. I had worked my way up to improve my French which took all of my energy. Learning French has also given me tremendous effort to appreciate this complicated language.
We wanted to be parents and we always believe that there are solutions to this right ? If worse comes to worst we will eventually consider the In-Vitro Fertilization. And if IVF won’t work adoption will be our second recourse.
Years had passed. One day, I went to my Gyne for a yearly check-up. Particularly because I felt a sharp pain from my lower abdomen. I didn’t think of anything else because that’s me when I normally have my monthly period. But when I went out from the clinic I had the biggest surprise of my life…..I was 2 weeks pregnant ! I cannot believe it but I was. Over the past 2 years after we got married, we had our first child and we named him Sébastien. In most situations, I know our waiting time appears to be relatively short compared to many. After 2 years and 3 months to be exact, I gave birth to another baby. Our second child is born and we named her Mayumi.
Husband keeps on bugging me for a third child. It’s not that I want it but I think we really are lucky to have already both. I did not stop taking my contraceptive pills and despite of that things had happened for a reason so consider it a blessing. When it rains, it pours ! blog about this to officially announce to friends that I am 4 months on the way for the third time. That is the reason why I am out of the circulation for a couple of months. The first 3 months was not easy but I feel better now. Now that I am back, I think I need to put a little life on this deserted blog. I believe in the saying, “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle”.
This is how the baby looks like, taken on the 11th week of my pregnancy
Comments
And I just also wanted to say that it's true having kids is not an obligation but it really cannot be a choice for some. They just can't & it's not by choice :)
Thanks, this pregnancy is somewhat unexpected Makis. You know the story behind. or probably you're my lucky charm ;)!
Not really an obligation but I know what you meant they just can't for medical reasons. But having kids in life is still by choice meaning either adoption or thru IVF). Everything is a choice. Pregnancy is a choice some would go for abortion because they are not ready. Adoption is a choice : Not all couples want an adoption or open about it. It's not also easy for some to raise a kid who's not their own. IVF is a choice : Others have a choice as to whether they go for it or not. To finish the procedure or to just let it go. Not to forget the financial aspect can be daunting for some.
Congratulations to both. Be safe...
Hi Toe, thank you very much! How have you been ?
I know, amongst my friends you knew about this unexpected 3rd pregnancy already. Things happen for a reason Hilda. I hope my experience will give hope to a lot of people out there.